Of Resolve and branches

Resolve a fickle entity you are
choose you I do duped by your exterior strength
of brick and stone you appear to be made
Rashly do I place you in my heart and mind

Little did my intelligence know
of the enmity between you and my heart
Senses chip away at those bricks
siding with my heart

O mind! I plead my case to you
heed my words that paint the future
our best interests is to reinforce these bricks
for all I want to do is to serve my guru...

Become my friend O mind
let us dwell not on these temporary branches
but on eternal topics that would
soothe the heart and senses.....Krishna.

Good night...

It is funny how we devotees always can find something to occupy ourselves with. If I was a karmi, staying here at the ayurvedic center I would have left screaming for being bored out of my mind. Benefits of being a devotee, Radha rati mataji and me are occupying ourselves with singing kirtans, reading the Bhagavatam (we have an aim to finish the first canto before we leave) and generally exchanging our realizations.

Last night I was particularly lamenting on my separation from Panihati Dham and the deities there. Deity worship is something that I miss truly from the core of my heart. You have to be a pujari to know what I'm talking about....a pujari who has no deities at the moment to serve. A small temple like Panihati dham where during the weekdays, it is just you and the deities....prabhupad singing softly in the main temple room, there is so much bliss that it really hurts knowing that it is highly impossible for me to go back to that kind of service.

Prabhupad's bhajans are the most soothing sounds in this world. Getting absorbed in Prabhupad's deep voice, removing Panihati candra's mukut pieces, scrubbing gopi dots off of Madan mohan, giving jagannath some fresh water for the night, sweeping and mopping the altar with some eucalyptus oil.....

Bringing in their beds....tucking Krishna's flute under his pillow...

"agaccha sayana-sthanam priyabhih saha kesava divya-puspatya-sayyayam sukham vihara madhava"

"Now come, O Kesava, along with Your beloved Srimati Radharani and Her friends, to the bed covered with transcendental, aromatic flowers. Now happily enjoy Your pastimes, O Madhava."

and then chanting the respectful mantras for everyone else , switch off the lights on the altar,
and then whisper a,
"Good night...".....and slowly tiptoe out the back locking the doors...

...until I see them the next morning glowing softly for Mangala arati....



So, Caitanya Mahāprabhu is very kind. Parama karuna, pahū dui jana. Two Lords, Nitāi-Gauracandra, Nityānanda Prabhu and Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu, They are very kind, you see? They have appeared just to reclaim the fallen souls of this age. So They are more kind than Krishna. Krishna, He is also very kind. He comes to deliver. But Kṛṣṇa demands that first of all surrender. Caitanya Mahāprabhu even does not demand surrender. He is so kind. (voice choking) So take shelter of Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu and be happy. Thank you very much. (weeping) (end)

-Srila Prabhupada, Arrival Address, February 28, 1975, Atlanta, Georgia.


You made Prabhupada weep...will I ever gaze at your merciful eyes again? scrub the chandan off your feet?....

A conversation overheard...

I am writing this sitting steps away from that Krishna
That Kanha whose lotus eyes are said to have been carved by Vishvakarma himself
Lotus eyes indeed! They look mesmerizing through Kanakadasa's window!
Feeling the breeze, hearing the melodious birds, leaves rustling

A conversation I overhear....





Radha: "Who taps on My door with one finger?"
Krsna: " O crooked girl, it is Madhava."
Radha: "Madhava is a name of spring. Has springtime come knocking on my door?"
Krsna: "Certainly not! It is the holder of the Sudarsana wheel"
Radha: "Potters hold wheels. Are you a potter?"
Krsna: "I am not. I am the person who holds up the entire world."
Radha: "The forked-tongue serpent king, Ananta holds up the world. Are you he?"
Krsna: "No. I am the person who crushes serpents."
Radha: "The bird-king Garuda crushes serpents. Are you he?"
Krsna: "No! I am Lord Hari!!"

- Appreciating Sri Vrndavana Dhama, Mahanidhi Swami

How delightful right? :D

For those of you who haven't caught the clue, I am in Udupi right now... enjoying the peace, catching up on my reading!

P.S: Maha-abhishek was so intense an experience that I cannot put words to it. Mercy? The word just doesnt cover it for Gauranga....

Our dear sages...

I came across a picture this morning and immediately the first thing I thought about was this verse..

"Once, in a holy place in the forest of Naimiṣāraṇya, great sages headed by the sage Saunaka assembled to perform a great thousand-year sacrifice for the satisfaction of the Lord and His devotees."

Srila Prabhupada - "....The great sages are always anxious to do good to the people in general, and as such the sages headed by Śaunaka and others assembled at this holy place of Naimiṣāraṇya with a program of performing a great and continuous chain of sacrificial ceremonies. Forgetful men do not know the right path for peace and prosperity. However, the sages know it well, and therefore for the good of all men they are always anxious to perform acts which may bring about peace in the world. They are sincere friends to all living entities, and at the risk of great personal inconvenience they are always engaged in the service of the Lord for the good of all people...."

- Srimad Bhagavatam: 1.1.4

And today, we have our dear sages who are assembled at Sridham Mayapur with the same intentions....

Photo from H.H BB Govinda Swami Maharaj's facebook album

Iskcon guru-vrinda ki jai!

Dhamvasi or spiritual warrior?

Question: I feel that sometimes staying in the dham is like spiritual sense gratification. You can hear the holy name 24/7, see devotees everywhere, get to do so much service, get wonderful association all the time. So I sometimes feel a little selfish if I have this desire to stay in the dham. Preaching in the material world is such an austerity. It is so hard to live outside the dham, deal with karmis all the time and preach. So how do we follow the mission of prabhupad while dealing with this desire to stay in the dham?

Answer by H.G Pankajhangri Prabhu: (paraphrased)

Well, staying in the dham is definitely spiritual sense gratification. It is wonderful to stay in the dham. But this sense gratification is the true sense gratification. The gratification we get in the material world is not real. But if we sacrifice this pleasure and go out and preach taking up this austerity, we become very very dear to Lord Chaitanya.

At the same time, it is very important to visit the dham to recharge. Which is why Prahbupad organized the Gaura Purnima festival and other festivals. We have to come to the dham once a year and recharge our batteries and go back out in the battlefield to preach.

Those who are really weak, then Krishna says, "Ok you can stay back here" I'm exposing my own weakness here :) I'm not personally so strong to go out and preach in the material world. So we get to stay back here :)

So I have been in the spiritual world for the last 12 days. Every moment was memorable but not every moment can be described by words unfortunately. I have written down a few beautiful moments such as the one above which I'll post as soon as I get a chance to.

The endless cycle.

Futility engraves itself in every move
Get hit by a tsunami, become a loner among friends,
diseases knocking on your door,
Sadly nothing makes you realize,
the futility of this endless cycle.

My cowherd boy

Tears trickle across my cheek
a divine voice singing across my ears
emotions welling up my heart
If just a mortal voice is so heart-rendering
How will your transcendental voice be
O bluish tinged cowherd boy?