"Mamma look!" Damodar squealed excitedly as he walked into the kitchen holding one month old Deva in his arms with my mother close behind him ensuring he is holding Deva well.
It was such a proud big brother moment for him as he walked in with the brightest smile ever, his eyes just sparkling with joy at holding a small baby. It then hit me.....my little boys are not so little anymore! Damodar suddenly looked like such a mature older boy - when did that happen??
I have always joked to everyone that I must be the only mother counting down days till Damodar and Sridhar start college. Suddenly I'm not so sure I'm looking forward for that day. I suddenly feel a loss and a twinge of sadness that in a few years they will not be dependent on me anymore. When just a year ago I was complaining with such exasperation, "Oh when will they be able to take a bath and eat on their own??!! "
Now they do and I feel a little lost.
Being born as a woman definitely has us as the disadvantaged sex. We see that even more these days with the #metoo movement, unfair wages etc. In spite of being disadvantaged, women always manage to be strong, focused and be successful. While I do feel the this disadvantages sometimes, when I look at my kids, I truly truly feel so blessed! Who else in this material world can experience the closest thing to spiritual love other than a mother?? And I feel so special that I can actually get a glimpse of what true unconditional spiritual love can be like. It feels so empowering!
It was such a proud big brother moment for him as he walked in with the brightest smile ever, his eyes just sparkling with joy at holding a small baby. It then hit me.....my little boys are not so little anymore! Damodar suddenly looked like such a mature older boy - when did that happen??
I have always joked to everyone that I must be the only mother counting down days till Damodar and Sridhar start college. Suddenly I'm not so sure I'm looking forward for that day. I suddenly feel a loss and a twinge of sadness that in a few years they will not be dependent on me anymore. When just a year ago I was complaining with such exasperation, "Oh when will they be able to take a bath and eat on their own??!! "
Now they do and I feel a little lost.
Being born as a woman definitely has us as the disadvantaged sex. We see that even more these days with the #metoo movement, unfair wages etc. In spite of being disadvantaged, women always manage to be strong, focused and be successful. While I do feel the this disadvantages sometimes, when I look at my kids, I truly truly feel so blessed! Who else in this material world can experience the closest thing to spiritual love other than a mother?? And I feel so special that I can actually get a glimpse of what true unconditional spiritual love can be like. It feels so empowering!
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