Of Resolve and branches

Resolve a fickle entity you are
choose you I do duped by your exterior strength
of brick and stone you appear to be made
Rashly do I place you in my heart and mind

Little did my intelligence know
of the enmity between you and my heart
Senses chip away at those bricks
siding with my heart

O mind! I plead my case to you
heed my words that paint the future
our best interests is to reinforce these bricks
for all I want to do is to serve my guru...

Become my friend O mind
let us dwell not on these temporary branches
but on eternal topics that would
soothe the heart and senses.....Krishna.

Good night...

It is funny how we devotees always can find something to occupy ourselves with. If I was a karmi, staying here at the ayurvedic center I would have left screaming for being bored out of my mind. Benefits of being a devotee, Radha rati mataji and me are occupying ourselves with singing kirtans, reading the Bhagavatam (we have an aim to finish the first canto before we leave) and generally exchanging our realizations.

Last night I was particularly lamenting on my separation from Panihati Dham and the deities there. Deity worship is something that I miss truly from the core of my heart. You have to be a pujari to know what I'm talking about....a pujari who has no deities at the moment to serve. A small temple like Panihati dham where during the weekdays, it is just you and the deities....prabhupad singing softly in the main temple room, there is so much bliss that it really hurts knowing that it is highly impossible for me to go back to that kind of service.

Prabhupad's bhajans are the most soothing sounds in this world. Getting absorbed in Prabhupad's deep voice, removing Panihati candra's mukut pieces, scrubbing gopi dots off of Madan mohan, giving jagannath some fresh water for the night, sweeping and mopping the altar with some eucalyptus oil.....

Bringing in their beds....tucking Krishna's flute under his pillow...

"agaccha sayana-sthanam priyabhih saha kesava divya-puspatya-sayyayam sukham vihara madhava"

"Now come, O Kesava, along with Your beloved Srimati Radharani and Her friends, to the bed covered with transcendental, aromatic flowers. Now happily enjoy Your pastimes, O Madhava."

and then chanting the respectful mantras for everyone else , switch off the lights on the altar,
and then whisper a,
"Good night...".....and slowly tiptoe out the back locking the doors...

...until I see them the next morning glowing softly for Mangala arati....



So, Caitanya Mahāprabhu is very kind. Parama karuna, pahū dui jana. Two Lords, Nitāi-Gauracandra, Nityānanda Prabhu and Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu, They are very kind, you see? They have appeared just to reclaim the fallen souls of this age. So They are more kind than Krishna. Krishna, He is also very kind. He comes to deliver. But Kṛṣṇa demands that first of all surrender. Caitanya Mahāprabhu even does not demand surrender. He is so kind. (voice choking) So take shelter of Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu and be happy. Thank you very much. (weeping) (end)

-Srila Prabhupada, Arrival Address, February 28, 1975, Atlanta, Georgia.


You made Prabhupada weep...will I ever gaze at your merciful eyes again? scrub the chandan off your feet?....

A conversation overheard...

I am writing this sitting steps away from that Krishna
That Kanha whose lotus eyes are said to have been carved by Vishvakarma himself
Lotus eyes indeed! They look mesmerizing through Kanakadasa's window!
Feeling the breeze, hearing the melodious birds, leaves rustling

A conversation I overhear....





Radha: "Who taps on My door with one finger?"
Krsna: " O crooked girl, it is Madhava."
Radha: "Madhava is a name of spring. Has springtime come knocking on my door?"
Krsna: "Certainly not! It is the holder of the Sudarsana wheel"
Radha: "Potters hold wheels. Are you a potter?"
Krsna: "I am not. I am the person who holds up the entire world."
Radha: "The forked-tongue serpent king, Ananta holds up the world. Are you he?"
Krsna: "No. I am the person who crushes serpents."
Radha: "The bird-king Garuda crushes serpents. Are you he?"
Krsna: "No! I am Lord Hari!!"

- Appreciating Sri Vrndavana Dhama, Mahanidhi Swami

How delightful right? :D

For those of you who haven't caught the clue, I am in Udupi right now... enjoying the peace, catching up on my reading!

P.S: Maha-abhishek was so intense an experience that I cannot put words to it. Mercy? The word just doesnt cover it for Gauranga....